thank GOD for dental floss!

Dental floss.. easily one of the best things I´ve ever discovered! Well.. come to think about it, I´m not that sure.. well.. it´s definitely in the top 2 with masturbation. When I discovered masturbation I felt like a little kid in a candy store.. WAIT A MINUTE! I think it actually happened in a candy store! but I´ll talk about that some other time.

I feel like without dental floss I would be in a mental institution right now, I have no idea WHY but having something between my teeth just drives me so freaking nuts! It´s like.. I know what´s wrong, it´s within my reaching range, I basically know WHAT and how to do, but I couldn´t fucking do it! Every single time I was trying to invent a new way to get the crap(NOT LITERALLY!) out.

This one time after eating a steak it happened again- oh the terror! Friend turned to me and asked: "DUDE.. what´s wrong? you´ve got a totally blank stare." And yeah, I did - I did everything to get the steak out from between my teeth! ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING! and nothing worked..

At one point I just sat down and stared hopelessly into thin air & replied: "I´m pretty much fucked right now" and.. I wanted to say "this moment can´t get any worse" when I remembered a picture where this squirrel said the same thing after getting his foot stuck in a bear-trap and some other animal came and fucked him in the ass.. I was as convenient as I wanted to be, didn´t feel like I should have jinxed that moment.

After some time I found a way to escape from the wrath of darkness and.. I´m always SO happy when I´m done flossing, I don´t know why! oh.. something I just noticed, yet another thing incommon with masturbation- haha!